The Book

1/4/07 - I can't change who I am - Evanescence

.. I guess part of what I did was out of revenge. But I swear that revenge wasn't the only thing on my mind when I decided to do what I did. I thought Caleb was extremely attractive from the very beginning. It just so happened that his best friend, Kevin, was the one I fell in love with. We dated for a year; I lived in Scranton while he lived in Erie. The two year difference in our ages proved nothing in our relationship- he even told me after the fact that had we been together, we never would've broken up. Well, thanks buddy. It doesn't help now. In April of 2006, we broke up. I was single the entire summer, and in so doing completed several of my conquests, including Caleb, in August. I must say, I enjoyed it thoroughly. That I would never lie about. However, Caleb and I felt that we should keep our rendevous a secret. And so it remained, until the very last days of December. I hadn't forgotten about it (how could I?), but I thought that I could possibly get away with screwing Kevin's best friend. Oh, foolish me. Caleb told him one night when they were drinking up a storm and were having a "good conversation, counting the ladies". Sick.
Have you ever gotten someone so mad at you that you shook? Literally, whether it be out of the cold and hard fear of knowing they can't stand to hear your voice, or some unconscious feeling that man cannot describe? Kevin was pouring his guts out to me one night; he didn't trust anyone, everyone had betrayed him, and I was the only one he had left.